Consistent Baby Steps
Successful change is about doing small things consistently. It’s making yourself do the thing even though you don’t want to because of your intention. Those intentions should be purposeful and based on your ideal future image. You literally have to train your brain to focus on the results you want to see. If you have an ideal body in mind then you should only focus on that body. Think about it all the time, obsess about it and commit to creating it.
If you want to achieve a goal then you have to give it everything you have until you reach that goal. If you want a better body you know what to do, exercise every day and give up the shit that’s making you fat. That means you’re not going to eat sugar or chips or whatever your food vice is until you get to your goal.
What happens when you reach your goal though? You give yourself a new goal. Every time I’ve successfully lost weight I’ve gained it back because I didn’t change my identity. I want to have the identity of a fit girl who’s kicking ass in her 40’s and beyond and I don’t want to give up on that image. If I decide to have that identity then I need to think about the things that version of myself would have to do. Fit people love themselves and fat people don’t so I want to be a fit person and that means I’m going to exercise every day and I’m not going to eat sugar and fat as much as I have been. I’m going to slowly start releasing it out of my diet until I’m ready to make a permanent change. I think if I can consistently start to obsess every day about who I am as a fit person, that means visualizing and feeling like I’m that person now then everything else will fall into place. Right now I’m 50 pounds overweight, well, 80 pounds if I’m following the guidelines for my height but I’ve felt the happiest about myself when I weigh 160 pounds so thats where I want to be. Maybe when I get there I can move toward a new goal to make myself look even better. That would be incredible and I only want to think about that.
What I know right now is that I’m committed to making small changes every day to move toward that goal. I’ve noticed that as long as I’m making progress toward that goal then I feel happier. Right now, for example, my pants are digging into my gut and I feel really uncomfortable. I feel so bad that I had to move to the table instead of sitting on the couch because it wasn’t working for typing. Even sitting in this chair with good posture is uncomfortable but I’m kind of happy to be in this discomfort because I know it’s going to change. I’m committed and I know I’m going to achieve it because it’s all I’m going to think about moving forward.
I definitely have fear, which I always do when I start moving toward a healthier lifestyle. Fear that I’m going to screw it up because I always have in the past. Key words…the past. I have to let the past go because it’s not going to get me anywhere. I have to train my thoughts to only think about my goal and to identify with the person I want to be. That means I have to be more self aware of my thoughts so I can ensure I’m doing the things that only a fit person would do. I have to be aware constantly. I’m committed to this. I know I’m not going to be perfect every day so I’m going to give myself that grace. I’m not going to be hard on myself and I’m not going tp think about this as giving up something but gaining something. I’m gaining a new identity and letting go of the beliefs that keep me stuck in this fat body.
I’ve been known to blame my weight on my addictions. “If I stopped doing A or B then I wouldn’t be overweight.” What I know now is that my mind and my habitual thoughts have been the problem this whole time. It’s so maddening to realize that all I have to change is my mindset with regard to who I am for positive change to take place. This is true self love. I think. I’m definitely not there yet because I feel uncomfortable in my own skin but I’m getting better and better every day and that’s all that counts.
Clearly, I’m in no place to give this advice considering that fact that I’m 80 pounds overweight right now but I’m not going to be that way for long because I’m committed. Well, I’m probably going to remain in this fat body for a while yet because I can’t be delusional. It didn’t take me a month to put this weight on, I’ve been gaining and losing my whole life. I think I’m going to start seeing significant change in 6 months. I just have to put in the work every day and that work isn’t going to have anything to do with restriction but everything to do with identity change and loving myself. If I truly loved myself I wouldn’t keep hurting myself with foods that are going to hurt me later.
I’m going to compliment myself for every hard thing I accomplish today. I’m going to practice discipline with eating and drinking and I’m going to practice discipline with my environment. I’m going to commit to doing a chore every day I come home from work to ensure I’m not tempted to make bad food decisions. On top of that I’m going to remind myself that I love myself and that means doing the hard things and for me, thats making sure I’m eating fruit and veggies each and every day and making sure I”m exercising in some way.
To be honest, I still feel like an imposter and I hate telling myself that i love myself because it feels fake and thats the problem right now. I don’t fully love myself and thats because of the way I feel about myself and that’s because of this fat unhealthy body. It’s just temporary though and I have to remind myself that loving myself means that I’m going to continue doing the hard things to reach optimal health, thats love. I don’t believe it yet but I’m going to trust this process.
-Dawn Rochelle ♡
